How to Stop Addictive Thoughts About Someone Bad for You

Limerence is one of the hardest things to get over because you're effectively breaking up with your imagination🥺❤️

‘See it for what it is, not for what you want it to be’

1. For the same reason addiction exists- an environment that is not stimulating enough. Commit to the work of creating a world that you enjoy living in. Remember there are other options that you haven't tried yet.

It's quite easy to get addicted to a fantasy of another person, and even to the fantasy version of yourself with the fantasy version of them.

The addiction is so real. He is charismatic, always upbeat, movie star looks, PhD research scientist but there are multiple deal beakers too long to list and he has more baggage than an airport. We have broken up, but I'm a still a junkie craving a dopamine hit. Can't get him out of my head.

It's easier said than done. LIMMERENCE is not just about stopping obsessive thoughts over someone. It's rooted in childhood, in trauma from neglected or abusive parents. If you don't heal childhood wounds , you will continue to obsess and fantasize.

It seems like Matthew speaks mainly to women. But as a man, I like to watch his videos and they have "helped" me too. We men have the same problems when dating, the same fears and make the same mistakes.

Charm is a skill. It definitely does not show who they are.

I now realize that my worst mistake is the illusion of what someone can be. I also never want to lose that. I need to be better about communicating expectations and letting their actions show me their place in my life.

The romantic idealism kills me, all the signs are there that I’m not valued. I’ve overcompensated so much probably cause of childhood trauma. There’s still this part of me that can’t let go. Logic vs heart. It’s torturous.

Matthew's videos appear at the EXACT time I need them....Thanks Matt....you are truly a God-send to so many people.

But there are a lot of people struggling with trauma bond or unsecured attachment styles. Like intellectually they know the person who ghost them are not good, but emotionally and psychologically they don’t know how to break the trauma bond and that’s why they still ruminate about the wrong person.

“Why do I have to convince you that going back to a drug is bad for you? You know!” Damn he’s right

Watching his videos just gives me that reminder to not do the things I know not to do, a good kick on the behind is sometimes needed 😂

I wish I could tell you how much of a right time this has come to me at. I am saving it and listening to this everyday till I emotionally accept this. ❤

Trauma has kept me bonded. Emotions make me feel things that aren't attached to reality. Astrology is unreliable because it's based on obscure ideas and thoughts that don't hold solid evidence and facts. In reality, I realize that I need to remove him from my life full stop. I'm done with the ups and downs of what keeps swirling around in my head. I'm done with being seen as a mutt. I am not his pawn. I don't want his friendship. I don't want his existence in my life at all....

Mathew Hussey, and his kindness and empathy paired with insight, is the reason I value the opinions of an empathetic "entrepreneur" over the views of a callous "activist" who lacks empathy. Where there's true empathy (instead of callousness and manipulation/calculation), there's wisdom. I used to be one of Mathew Hussey's biggest critics 5+ years ago, but I acknowledge that his advice is humane and kind. He was able to adapt to our changing world and its modern challenges because he understands (and feels) human emotions. And he's decent enough not to exploit them, but to equip others to adequately deal with their own emotions and the emotions of other people to lead a more aware, authentic and kind / self-loving life. That's a huge accomplishment, Mathew!

Dopamine is stimulated by just thinking about the person you crave

You’re so good Matthew. Unfortunately no matter how many times I’ve watched your videos, I still have those addictive thoughts about a man who doesn’t want to be with me 😢

We have these thoughts coz we allow our minds to play tricks and wr dont allow our mind to accept the reality of the situation. Awesome