Autism and Aspergers in Older Autistic Adults (60+ Years Old) | Patrons Choice

The whole "no empathy" thing kept me from realizing for years, because my empathy is extremely high.

This was such a tough video to watch. Sometimes it feels like the world only cares about autism when you are a child. They deserve support as much as children, or maybe even more. I think you're doing an amazing job giving voice to them. I really hope they find some support eventually.

I’m 69 and diagnosed last month. I agree and understand these people talking. What’s depressing is looking back on a lifetime of knowing something wasn’t right but didn’t know exactly what it was. It affected my life in very, very significant ways.

I’m 72 and was diagnosed around three years ago, after suspecting that I had been on the spectrum for several years. The isolation under Covid gave me the chance to sort out my thoughts and to isolate my autistic traits from those I share with neurotypical people. My most common one (and the hardest to control) is the tendency to go down the rabbit hole in conversations - my enthusiasm for a topic blinds me to the boredom/irritation of others. When I realise, I get anxious and it makes me talk even more - desperate to be understood. My worst regret is the loss of my youth, accepting my family’s continual abuse for being ‘weird’ and their assumption that I should stay single as I was too unlovable to marry. I hung around for 40 years trying to win the approval and affection of those who were incapable of ever giving it. Now I suffer CPTSD along with the agonizing emotional flashbacks inevitably triggered during everyday interactions. If I had the chance to live my life again, knowing what I know now, I would take it, even with the abuse, for I would know enough to disregard the gaslighting and escape as soon as I could. Then I might have had the chance to carve out a fulfilling life for myself. I’m doing that now, but there is so much I want to do and I am already too old for much of it. Basically I need another lifetime. Grief? Hell yes! I feel loss for the life I missed, the time I spent achieving what was expected and using all my energy masking to achieve it. The knowledge that you are autistic is enormously liberating, it explains so much, it identifies your strengths, it outlines your areas of interpersonal risk and it comforts when you are told you aren’t acceptable. I grieve that I wasn’t armed with that knowledge until I was old. Thank you for this post. It showed me that I wasn’t alone.

I am 58 and have been wanting to see more content like this. This is an almost completely underserved group of people. I don't know what will become of me if I become incapacitated, there are no resources. I am ok now, working, reasonably healthy but super loner also. I worry about my cats if something happens to me. I just don't want to be incapacitated. Please dedicate maybe one video every quarter to this population--so needed!!!!

I'm 66 years old and realized I had aspergers at 64. It's been a lonely journey. I'm so glad to hear of other seniors who are in a similar situation. I've had 4 psychiatric admissions over the years and finally realized they were major meltdowns. Ive been misdiagnosed since I was 5 years old and now I'm retired and completely exhausted. Years of wearing a mask, I'm now mentally spent and isolated. It gets more difficult as you get older

90 years old my mom was finally diagnosed. Thinking back on her life, challenges growing up as a highly intelligent girl during the Great Depression and a lifetime of being dismissed, it’s a new start for her. Love these videos. Thank you

Almost 53, diagnosed 3 years ago. This is the first time I've seen people older than me with Autism. Please thank them all for this video, and you for making it. I feel less alone now.

I think we, or many of us, have too much empathy. To the point it makes us shut down because we feel too much. We also do not always have a way to filter or the vocabulary to put to expressing feelings that overwhelm us. I also prefer to be alone but would like to make some aspie friends. 💕❤️‍🩹🙏

I just want to give Josė a big hug. She’s a good person deep down and just needs to know there are people in the world who “get it” and you’d be a welcome friend.

I've been blubbering like a baby after watching Paul's video. Crying because the people sharing their stories are like me and crying because I've been alone my whole life with no support. I'm a 73 year old woman. I know now that Asperger's has impacted my entire life. After coming across one of these videos a few years ago I did endless research and now after watching this video there's no question I'm on the spectrum. These are the only people I've told. My GP, my psychiatrist, my Mom, sister, son, and two close friends. Most have brushed this off as me being dramatic and weird. None have asked me about it or even mentioned it again so I haven't mentioned it again. I'm sharing this video with a couple of people I actually care about. Thank you Paul for all that you do for us. I so relieved and grateful.

I am 64 and self-diagnosed late last year. About five years ago, I did some provisional testing online and scored quite highly on several different available tests. I didn't think too much about it at the time but have been following Autistic YouTubers, Tweets and Instagrammers because I have two Autistic grandchildren. I just kept having AHA moments. I have been seeing my 4th psychologist for about a year now and mentioned it to her. She showed me her notes about me where she had written "Autistic ?" in the margin but hadn't mentioned it to me. It seems that I am most likely Autistic with ADHD (deficit type). I am happy to start to get to know who I am and why I've never really fitted into social groups and always been a loner. It's okay. Now I tell people up front that I'm Autistic and ask them to be understanding. If they can't accept that, they can shove it. It has been enlightening for my husband of 45 years, and he is learning new responses to my behaviours. We are much closer now. I do grieve for the little child and the teenage me who always had mammoth struggles and was so misunderstood. I cry for her, but I'm happy for me. I just wish that I'd known a long, long time ago, my life would have been very different.

I’m a 66 year old women who has never been formally diagnosed, and I relate to so much of what I’m hearing. Thank you.

61 yeas old. Not officially diagnosed but I know. I sometimes feel like what is going on in my head makes so much sense to me but it is perceived as "weird" by others. It is nice to see that other adults can understand. I am high functioning and can STRUGGLE to behave "normally" in business settings; but it is a constant struggle.

I’m 70 years young. I’ve suspected but as of now never been diagnosed. As a kid, I didn’t start talking until I was 4. I was the bullied kid that finally had enough and dropped out of school at 14. While at school I failed at everything until a math teacher figured me out and taught me the joys of math where I went from a 15% to a 98%. I’m married, but live in separate houses in the mountains of British Columbia. I for the most part find it extremely difficult to socialize. I find my peace of mind sitting beside a creek, under old growth cedars, meditating, with my dog looking out for me. My only advice, embrace your uniqueness . I look around and see how others live and I become grateful for being me.

59 this year. I was diagnosed 5 years ago. Before that, rafts of depression drugs I didn't need. Much better now...

My wife and I are both 67. She’s autistic/ADHD I’m ADHD/dyslexic. We both found out (undiagnosed) after multiple grandkids were diagnosed as Autistic and or ADHD. The changes we have experienced because of this awareness and learning (fromPaul) and others has run the gambit of emotions and begun a process of personal reflection, change and relationship upheveal that will probably not end. We are both grateful for the knowledge yet find ourselves grieving over what could have been and how our lives would have been shaped if we had “known before”. Our future together is significantly brighter because we know and slowly we have been informing family and friends starting with the safest. It appears this process will take years particularly for my wife, because she has experienced orders of magnitude more trauma as a result of peoples reaction to autism. Thanks Paul for all you provide it changes and improves peoples lives. Thank you to each of the panel for being willing to share your personal experience I found it comforting to hear of your experience. Thanks to each of you!

Though I'm not quite 60 yet, this topic is for me. As many of us in this age group know, few Aspies get this far in life unscathed. Looking forward to this video.

I am 61. Yep! "Learning to catch myself when I go down a rabbit hole in a conversation" This can be SO difficult to do. And the funny thing is that I know what I am doing when I am doing it but I just can not stop and correct the course of my speech while it is happening. I have learned that the best thing for me to do is to own my words and apologize if my words were offensive.

I love Jim’s comment “Try to look at what we’re good at instead of what we’re not good at. Because what we’re not good at is so obvious.” 💙🥲