The Attachment Theory: How Childhood Affects Life

The Attachment Theory just won a film prize at TREFF, Tromsø‘s Education Film Festival in Norway. The jury gave us a prize for Best Open Access Education. 🎉🎥🇳🇴 Thank you all for your support!!!

Some parents have no idea how much they messed up their children...

"Heal before having a children so your children don't have to heal having you as a parent"

One of my favorite parts about being a dad is when my kids are telling me something and they accidentally call me ‘mom’. It makes me think that I occupy the same safe warm place in their brain that their mom does.

I grew up without any emotional or physical contact with my parents even though we all lived together throughout. I had my first hug at age 18. My instincts wanted to push the person away. Thankfully this wonderful person stuck with me and slowly showed me how wonderful it is to feel love and affection. We’ve been together for 40 years now and have 2 children and 3 grandchildren all of whom are very loving balanced and confident. This just shows the power of love can overcome a history of neglect if the circumstances allow. I still have deep seated issues, which are mine to own but my life is wonderful and I count my blessings everyday that I’m able to appreciate the true value of love. Especially love for your children. Allowing them to grow with confidence and wonder.

I remember my friend talking to her parents so freely... I was so surprised because it looks so unusual and weird. But then I realized that they’re normal parents.

This is why educating parents to be good parents are far more crucial than educating the children.

I remember breaking into tears the day I found out I was pregnant with my first child. The nurse asked me if I didn't want him or her. I told her it wasn't that, but that I was terrified of being a mother like mine. She told me that the fact that I felt and thought that way meant I wouldn't be, but that I needed to educate myself, or take classes. She then proceeded to give me a book, I can't recall atm, but it gave me a head start. I went to every class, read a bunch, and took on what seemed sensible to me. I feel so, so grateful for that nurse. My boys are adults now. I made mistakes raising them, but they weren't the ones my biological mother made. I truly loved my boys and nothing in the world would've made me hurt them like she hurt me. I'm glad she died before she met them, or they met her, because she would've hurt them as well. It has nothing to do with my forgiving what she did, or anything of that kind. She was the master of the universe and anything she did was her right. I disagreed, and that was, in her mind, the slave rebelling. Until the end of time.

How many else here grew up in a home with an emotional absence, where parents rarely talked about or showed much feelings? Because of this It’s like I miss a kind of emotional “recipe” that everyone else has learned to create and maintain social relationships that I don’t have. Like I want to communicate feelings but I just don’t know how to.

Parenting should be a subject at school.

"So, many broken children living in grown bodies mimicking adult live's."

other kids can talk to their parents about everything and when I try to have a normal conversation with my parents it always ends up in huge arguments and I've learnt that the only person who's there for me at all times is myself, so I don't bother telling my parents anything, I rather keep everything to myself and let it destroy me from the inside

As we prepare to welcome our first baby into the world in a few months, I’ve been processing and exploring my childhood traumas and things I disliked about how I was patented. I feel like I pulled on a sweater string and the more I investigate the more I realize how I unhealthy my childhood was. It’s amazing how it’s shaped my self image, negative outlook and encouraged shame and self hatred. I’m so thankful to be processing all of this before our little one comes so I can be more encouraging and supportive as a parent!

Conclusion: I need a therapist.

I've always been jealous of those who could express their emotions to their parents and get a ton of encouragement and support. If I ever tried opening up about my feelings I'd get called stupid and just be totally disregarded:/

I was raised only by my schizophrenic grandmother in a shack until age 10, was kept home schooled and isolated, and after that I bounced around the foster care system. It would take an entire novel to outline how messed up my childhood was and the effect it had on the rest of my life. Now I've been married 14 years and I'm retired at 44. We never wished to bring children into this crazy world so we didn't. I mostly give God the credit for my success. Moral of the story: the world is unfair and nasty. When life beats you down, get back up and keep going. (Yeah, I stole that from Rocky Balboa.) I wouldn't trade my weird upbringing for a normal one for a second. It gave me resources to draw from that most people will never understand. Be thankful for whatever you do have, don't be bitter and NEVER give up.

My mother had this great idea that if I ever started crying, she would leave me in a dark room by myself, until I stopped crying and came to her, So I did but were never able to express my trust and feelings towards her. She had great care to me.. but I’m not sure about living me in a room to cry, rather than coming and hugging me. I haven’t received a hug ever, but I wish for one.

If I ever met someone that said they loved me and wanted me to be happy, I'd think they were crazy or trying to trick me.

I got really emotional when I watched this because children are so special and we can hurt them so easy

My childhood was quite lonely full of social isolation, I remember having no friends in daycare and in school would often walk alone, and now in my last year of high school I am terrified of the change that will soon come as well as the fact that I am also struggling with my lessons. I am insecure as a result. I hope that others won't have to go through the emotional pain that I went through. I may help other using my experience, but that doesn't heal the wound left on my heart.