How NOT To Critique Movies

the downvoters didn't understand the underlying themes and allegorical representations within this video

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. that way, you are a mile away and have their shoes" - anon

I remember my English Literature teacher asking me about the aims of Shakespear when he wrote 'Henry V'. "Well, the rent for his rooms and bar bills were due. He knew he could crack out a real crowd-pleaser and, if he made the hero a British king, he'd be able to get interest from Queen Elisabeth!" "Well, that's a possibility ... but not exactly what the O Level exam board will want to hear. So, can you come up with something more pretentious?" I loved that teacher!

Francis Ford Coppola once said "The only thing needed for a good movie are good writing and good acting" Thanks for fighting the good fight.

Saying themes are more important than plot, structure, and character development is like saying the steak was shit but the sauce was good.

"Aww shit man, he's been writing for BuzzFeed this whole time" I died

I got an 85% on a book report without actually reading the book. I just talked about its "themes" while grabbing random lines from the books to make my paper look more legit.

Years ago, I trolled a friend of mine about how I wouldn’t watch The Shawshank Redemption until he watched Howard the Duck. He agreed. Within less than a half hour, he stopped the Howard to express his disgust. He was right: the ridiculous premise, the duck-related puns, the duck-related tits… I knew this already, of course. However, I’m a monster, and began “explaining the deeper themes” of Howard being a Messiah figure and the like. We had this conversation over the course of two hours, where I did not break character and watched his brain melt. I still laugh about it.

The Room is a slow-paced psychological thriller that deals with the following themes: a relationship breaking down. Betrayal by a significant other. The loss of mutual friends. Grief and sadness. Escape from a toxic relationship, and moving on. And it ends in a powerful twist ending that you rarely see in mainstream movies. Clearly The Room is a 10/10 masterpiece.

Just hit em' with the Tarantino: "I reject your hypothesis."

The notion that just because a work has themes it's immune to criticism is hilarious to me. Not only does Drinker correctly point out that a good, solid theme can be ruined by horrible execution, but there's also such a thing as a stupid, contrived or boring theme as well. That's almost like saying "You can't criticize this movie/story/whatever because it has characters!" Themes are just something that most stories generally have, the question is whether they are well thought out, well executed and compelling.

The real issue is that no one these days seems to be able to say "Yeah it was trash, but I still liked it" anymore. You can even say that the other person doesn't get it but again, accepting the flaws seems to not be an option for a lot of people online these days. They've fallen for the bullshit that is the "art is subjective" mentality. You're not allowed to say something is bad if someone can string enough bullshit together to make it seem deep and impactful. The problem is that saying art is subjective misses the reality of the thing (and this is coming from an art major). You can like something and accept that it's not good. Most people don't like modern art, architecture, etc. So if most people don't like it, that means it's objectively bad right? Nope. Not in the minds of "artists" and "critics" who think that because their brains work different (whether that's from mental illness I'll never know) that means that they can see things in ways others can't and BECAUSE of that they can decide what's good and what's not and no one else can have an opinion. I guess the point I'm making is that you've got people that are so self absorbed and in love with their own opinions that they'll refuse to accept something as bad if they can find meaning in it. Even worse, they won't accept that maybe their tastes aren't as refined as they pretend they are. They scoff at those who enjoy the stupid fun action that come with giant monster movies or even a few superhero films because they treat themes as padding that just prolongs the run time until they get to what everyone wants to see. Rare you'll find someone who enjoys a B movie defend it on the merits of "Well it explores x". They accept the flaws in it, and hell sometimes it's the flaws that make them more enjoyable. But with a lot of "critics", particularly from the Twitterverse, flaws don't exist so long as the right politics or themes are discussed. They won't accept that it's bad because they don't wanna seem lame for liking something they know is bad. But honestly there's nothing inheritely wrong with liking bad movies so long as you admit it. There's nothing wrong with saying "Yeah it's not a good film but hey, I enjoyed it anyway".

This review explores themes of alcoholism and depression, with distinct subtexts of sarcasm and righteous indignation. Solid 9/10

Praising a movie for its “themes” is akin to saying “he meant well.”

Dear Sir: You completely won me over with your insightful reviews. What I most respect about you, is your insistence on what I would call "composition". You look for well composed movies and media, those that have coherent scripts and solidly built structure. I find it interesting that people seem to be impatient with you for that. You make it very clear that you're just fine with any given actor playing any given role (as long as they're competent), provided the narrative remains solid, it all fits together, and there's no obvious pandering. In other words, provided the whole maintains its artistic integrity. I agree with you.

If you have to explain what a movie symbolizes,it doesn't. -Roger Ebert

Themes can make a good film great. Themes CANNOT make a bad film good.

"Thematic undertones" = Clusterfuck writing "Allegorical representation" = Bankrupt Moneyshot

I guess this is why your reviews are so spot on... because they have real content and actual substance. Even if that substance is alcohol.

For the record, your Midsummer review was 200% spot-on.