Failures, Friendships and Forgiveness

It's quite a thing for you to share your thoughts and I applaud you for it. I wish you peace, love, and serenity. You're a good man, Max.

Sounds like you are awfully hard on yourself Max. It would be lovely if you were as kind too yourself as your friends are to you, or you are to your friends. Onwards and upwards!

I don’t think there is an easy way for any of us to fix this, make you feel better, make you feel less pain. However, hopefully you can take some comfort in knowing that there is people who are here for you, supporting you and championing you. I hope things get easier for you

“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o-er wrought heart and bids it break.” That is advice from Shakespeare... and I think he was on to something. Onwards and upwards and I hope, you will, on occasion, take us along for the ride. :) Be well, Max.

Life has taught me that relationships seldom fail solely because of the actions of one person. In essence we make friends and are lucky to fall in love at times throughout our lifes, but nothing is certain, and sometimes not forever, we just need to remain thankful for the opportunities of knowing love and savoring those memories. I am a little (may be a lot) older than you and met someone new 12 months ago after being single for nearly 10 years. He proposed last week, what I am badly trying to say is being alive and living a full life for me means never stopping being open to possibilities or closing down and always taking advantages of what's thrown our way. Never say never ...although I realise it may not feel like that right now x x

That took guts man, seriously. Thank you. None of us are experts at life, we're always learning. Your attitude is inspirational.

“I’m going to be okay. I’m going to make things - some interesting things. And have some interesting adventures. And i’m going to film them. And you guys can watch them. So there’re good things to look forward to.” That’s the right spirit Max! Some of us who are (happily) tied down in relationships don’t always get the time to make things and have the adventures that we did when we were single. I get immense pleasure and inspiration from watching you make things and having the adventures that I can’t. Please keep it up! And I hope that you find all the happiness/relationships and companionship that you deserve.

At a time like this your friends —online and off— want to “Hoover” your pain away but there is no way to do that. Certainly not in a YouTube comment. I hope videos like this are as therapeutic as they are courageous.

Thanks for this Max, you really bare your soul to us. I lost my wife to cancer this year, sometimes relationships end through no fault of either party. I found strength in your honesty, as I find strength through the family and friends who are helping me to navigate this grief. Stay strong brother.

It happened to me 10 years ago. She broke of the relationship. I was heart broken, trying to understand why, trying to reason. I was in a bad way for a long time, depressed and lonely. But then then I realized, that one should always practice self love and forgeiveness first and then if you have love left then sure give it to someone you care for. But dont ever compromise on your self over that other. You come first. If you can not be your self in a relationship and you constantly feel compelled to please that other then the relationship is doomed. because it is not a mutually beneficial relationship. learn to see the signs. Unfortunately, most of us learn the hard way, that important lesson in life. When you are infatuated with that other it can be difficult to see clearly.

It's all been said, but I'd just like to let you know how important are your videos and also those from some other posters to people like me. After several failed attachments when I was a young man, I finally found someone who would tolerate me and we have now been together for nearly fifty years. Sadly, my wife is now in poor health and virtually housebound. Caring for her means that I am also tied pretty much to the house and cannot pursue the many hobbies I enjoyed. I would have loved to have restored a Series IIA Land Rover, but that is never going to happen, so your videos give me a great deal of vicarious pleasure. I cannot go out to see friends as I used to, so watching you and listening to your experiences is a connection I much appreciate. Thank you: just thank you.

My friend helped me yrs ago with “It’s a life lesson, not a life sentence! “

I hope you know how much your videos help and inspire your viewers Max

Never commented before anywhere, but wanted to say how much i enjoy the videos and how its a privilage having watched you share your heart. Once step at a time Max.

Never been prouder to be a patron, tears in my eyes as I write this xxx

There’s not many people I listen to and take notice of on the YouTube, but you’re one of the few. Be well Max

Much as I love your daft projects and practical guides, these 'sitting down and talking' videos are honestly the most powerful. More power to you Max! I'm looking forward to these making and adventuring vids too.

I'm glad that you took your own advice (it's good advice, usually is) and were able to talk to your friends. Getting it out and having another listen is very powerful and therapeutic. Yay to building interesting things and having adventures 👍!

Wish you lived near me in Exeter , I would love you as a counsellor ...not because of qualifications (or likely lack of ) but I see your humanity, openess, authenticity, gentleness and vulnerability which puts me at ease and your company would no doubt be very therapeutic . I have spent my entire adult life ( now 58 ) trying to find peace of mind and purpose without success despite so many opportunities and much privilege . Having a good friend would have made such a difference but everyone jumped ship when depression arrived 30 yrs ago . Alcohol kept me going ..made life worth living until 6 yrs ago when the end was near. Sober 6 yrs now ..and despite lucky to have a loving partner ..the hole inside where something is missing (and always has) just keeps my subjective experience of life as being a constant struggle. I'm sure you won't read this Maximus but thank you for sharing and helping many others ..you can see by the comments how many folk sense what a good man you are . As the old Buddhist saying goes " May you be well , May you be happy , May you be free from suffering and at peace with yourself and all others" . Big Man Hug from Devon , Bill x

Thank you max for your honesty. It is good to hear a practical, down to earth man talk about these things. This is a little bit of the story towards taking the stigma out of men talking about our challenges. I am sure many of us are guilty of bottling things up when we should’ve sharing.